I first met Shirley and the two Judys when the nuns at our church decided to leave their jobs as religious educators to do pastoral work with the sick and needy. Suddenly the Continuing Christian Education program needed two leaders to administer the challenge of finding, training and supporting the program that provided our youngest parishioners with weekly classes designed to teach them about the tenets of the Catholic Church. The departure of the two beloved women who had created and managed the CCE program necessitated a search for individuals who might replace them. An earnest attempt to find other nuns to step into their shoes proved to be futile, so for the first time lay persons would have to do the job. That’s when Shirley and I came into the picture.

I was stunned to receive a call from the good Sisters asking me to come talk with them at the parish offices. I had no idea what the meeting was going to be about but I did not hesitate to accept their invitation. After a few pleasantries they got to the heart of the matter and asked me to accept the position of Co-Director of the CCE program. They explained that I would shepherd the Pre-School and Elementary group and that a woman named Shirley who had already agreed to take the job would be the head of the middle school and high school classes. 

I explained that I was taking classes at the University of Houston in the hopes of finishing my degree and beginning a full time teaching job, but the nuns discussed ways that I would be able to balance all of that with a great deal of flexibility. When I asked why they had even thought of me, they pointed to the energy and excitement of the one class that I taught each Sunday morning. They saw me as a leader and wanted to tap into what they viewed as my potential. Since I have always loved a good challenge I found myself accepting their proposal as they outlined my duties and apologized that the salary of four thousand dollars a year was so low. They laughed and explained that the parishioners were not yet accustomed to paying for the talents of lay people but that hopefully that would one day change. 

I was in my late twenties raising two very young daughters at the time, taking classes at the university, and serving as a teacher at a local pre-school two mornings a week. Somehow I created a schedule that would allow me to accomplish all of my tasks and still be a good mom and wife and give my new job the attention it desired. Then it was time to meet my co-worker, Shirley and the two Judys who would be essential to making everything work 

Shirley and I instantly hit it off. She was smart, fun and energetic. Best of all she was delightfully filled with laughter while also knowing how to run a tight ship. I felt that with the help of the women we would eventually call the “two Judys” we would be just fine. One Judy would maintain our budget with precision and the other would serve as a receptionist, attendance clerk and all around individual willing to help with any need. Both Judys had already worked with the good nuns for years and were welcoming to the two newbies that we were, A legendary team was born. 

Things were not always smooth because there were individuals who were wary of allowing two ordinary women to be in charge of the religious education of their children. They longed for the nuns who had been such a fixture of the parish and somehow hoped that our tenure would only be temporary until more religious women might be found. For the most part though we were embraced by everyone and when things got a bit tough we rallied around each other. I grew to love Shirley and the two Judys as though they were my sisters. 

We all worked together for a couple of years until I had earned my degree and landed a full time job teaching mathematics. With great reluctance I had to leave the wonderful women who had made me laugh and smile and just feel wonderful. I suggested that my dear friend, Pat, would be a great replacement for me and so I left the program in exceptionally good hands. I decided that our sisterhood should never end and so I began a tradition of meeting up at least once a year at Christmas time. That tradition has continued to the present day and my relationship with Shirley the two Judys and Pat only grew stronger over the years. 

Shirley has always been a survivor, able to overcome any challenges that came her way. When she became single again she had to adapt her lifestyle to the economic changes that came. She worked at different jobs as a tax specialist and continued her love of cooking. I was lucky to be the recipient of her banana bread and strawberry preserves. She seemed to be the master of so many trades and an inspiration to all of us who know her. 

The two Judys continued to work for the church. They were loved quite rightly by all of the parishioners. Pat grew the program and became as much of an admired fixture at the church as the Judys had always been.

One of the Judys died a few years back, a shocking development considering that she was still quite young. Nonetheless our “Church Lady” meetings continued. then Pat also died from cancer that seemed so unlikely in a woman who had always been the picture of good health. Shirley, Judy and I continued our tradition and often spent hours laughing together and suggesting that we should get together more often than once a year. 

Not long ago Shirley had a stroke that left her unable to speak or take care of herself. She has been in a nursing home where her daughter Chrystal regularly visits. Covid prevented Judy and I from visiting but the two of us still got together and spoke of how much we appreciated Chrystal for keeping us apprised of Shirley’s situation with photos and anecdotes that make us smile. Somehow it is heartbreaking to see Shirley looking so vacant but heartwarming to observe the loving care that Chrystal brings to her. 

Judy and I have spoken of going to see Shirley but I suppose we both worry that she will not know who we are or that we will not know how to act in her presence. I keep telling myself that Shirley would have already been to see either of us numerous times. She was unafraid of difficult situations and always knew exactly what to say on any occasion. 

I loved everyone of those ladies with whom I worked. I will always be grateful to the nuns for giving me such a wonderful purpose with incredible people. The memories of our time together are golden and I suppose it is time for me to gather my courage and do the right thing just as I did when I accepted that job long ago. It’s well best time to go visit Shirley if only to let her and Chrystal know how much I love them both. it is certainly what Shirley would do if the table were turned.