As a child I always felt completely safe even though my mother sometimes warned me of dangers that might not have seemed so bad to me. She preached caution constantly like not opening the door to strangers and never getting into a car with someone I did not know. She was so worried that she had to really know the members of a family before allowing me to go inside homes to play with friends. She was never a fan of having me spend the night away from home either. I suppose like most kids I found her concerns to be over the top. I tended to believe in the goodness of all people and never really understood why she was so restrictive with me.
As an adult I began to learn of terrible things that happened to young children when nobody was looking. I soon enough realized that my mother’s cautionary warnings grew out of both love and the reality of the world in which we live. I suppose that mostly nothing really bad happened to me because I was afraid of getting into trouble if I disobeyed. I eventually saw her wisdom in keeping me somewhat sheltered from harm. Even in the few times that a difficult situation occurred I knew exactly how to handle myself because of her constant advice.
We want to protect our youngsters and yet it is not always possible. They might go to school and be there when a shooter takes out his rage. They may be just having silly childish fun and end up frightening someone enough to shoot first and ask questions about what is really happening later.
Even with all of my mother’s admonishments I played pranks just like most kids do. Back then the big thing was to make crank phone calls. We had so much fun pulling a joke on friends and even strangers. iI never occurred to us that our silliness might be taken seriously and end up with a heap of trouble. So it was with wrapping houses when my daughters were young. Not only did our place get swathed with rolls of toilet paper but my daughters often joined groups to play the same tricks on other friends. While my husband and I watched through the cracks of our blinds as kids decorated our trees and and our lawn some folks got rather angry. I know that one of my daughter’s friends, who was wonderful young man, once encountered an angry father who was ready to call the police when he caught him papering his property.
I suppose that things have become even more iffy in today’s world when people have so many guns that they are ready to point and use if they suspect that they are in danger from an intruder. So it was in my town when a young boy was playing what they now call “ding dong ditch” with his friends on a weekend evening. The young man who was only eleven years old rang a doorbell and quickly ran away but the owner of the house was ready with his gun and shot the boy in the back as he darted from the house. Many lives have been ruined over this tragedy because not only is the boy dead but the man who shot him has been jailed for murder.
I don’t know how this will ultimately play out but I learned some time ago to be careful about approaching a home late at night when the people inside were not expecting me. My husband and I had gone to visit his parents and went to the backdoor rather than the front to rouse his parents with a knock. Our surprise visit was greeted by his father who held a loaded and cocked pistol. Luckily my husband had the presence of mind to address his father before he pulled the trigger but everyone was rattled in the aftermath. It had been so dark that my father-in-law had no idea who was out there in the shadows of night. Needless to say we never again when to my in-law’s home without first warning them that we were on our way.
I know that kids will continue to pull pranks and that people inside homes will continue to be frightened when it is late at night. The potential for an innocent death is great in these times when people are more and more frightened and more and more armed. Back in my day folks often left their doors open until they retired for bed and even then windows were open to let in air because air conditioners were rare. I don’t think they were very fearful and all but times have changed.
The proliferation of fear and guns creates an accident waiting to happen so parents would do well to keep track of their children at all times, especially at night. I would warn young people not to go up to porches and doorways after a certain hour and never if they do not know the people inside. I hate to be a wet blanket limiting the antics that have been around since Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn but it is just too dangerous to be free range like kids once were. It’s sad but the reality of what might happen is very real.
I grieve for the parents of that young boy and for the family of the man whose trigger finger put him in jail. I suspect we will have many points of view regarding this horrific event but perhaps my mother was right in voicing some caution. As parents we have to educate and protect our young. If we teach them well perhaps they will be lucky enough to avoid a deadly encounter.
All It Takes Is A Little Love 