Category: Commentary

I have a friend whose precious little boy has a thing for watching soccer games and enjoying anything related to dinosaurs. He’s got dinosaur shirts, toys, books and games. He loves visiting museums that house dinosaur bones and replicas. At four years old he has more knowledge of dinosaurs than most adults. 

I suppose that dinosaurs have fascinated humans for centuries. It’s almost impossible to imagine how massive they were and what it was like when they roamed the earth. One of the greatest mysteries of all time is why they seemed to so suddenly disappear. I’ve heard all sorts of theories for what contributed to their demise. Some hypothesize that they might have developed some kind of virus or that a gigantic asteroid hit the earth causing a kind of cataclysm. Others suggest that there was a protracted drought or conversely a dramatic freeze. Whatever it was, they left forever but evidence that they were here has been found across the globe. I suppose that their ultimate extinction makes them even more fascinating

I often wonder if it would have been possible for dinosaurs and people to coexist. Of course the movie Jurassic Park makes that seem unlikely. Having those massive creatures around would most certainly have had a profound effect on our own evolution and development of civilization. How would we have kept them at bay given their often enormous sizes and, in some cases, violent natures? Even the fittest humans would have had to be quite innovative to survive around those creatures.

We tend to take our tenure on this earth for granted as though it is a given, and yet the story of the dinosaur demonstrates that even such grand specimens are not immune to extinction. Our advantage is our ability to think, but unfortunately we do not always use that special gift of brain power as well as we should. Our intelligence has made us seemingly the masters of the planet. We have a kind of dominion over all the other creatures. We have even learned how to tackle tiny microbes that create disease, but we have weaknesses that could lead us to the same kind fate as the dinosaurs. 

The state of the world as this moment is revealing many of the flaws of our human responses. We are often tribal when we should be united instead. We fall prey to ignorance, pettiness, jealousies that lead us to disagreements and violence. We often abuse our planet and each other without thinking much about the ultimate consequences of our actions. We are much more intricate, interesting and incredible than the dinosaurs with their tiny brains and inability to think about changing in order to survive. Still, we sometimes act as though we are not any more intelligent than the giant reptiles who succumbed to whatever disaster made them extinct. We have to realize that many of our destructive tendencies have the potential of destroying us. Luckily there are always seem to be enough humans thinking ahead to keep themselves and most of the rest of us alive and well on this planet, but we have to be willing to listen to what they have to say.

I’m not much of a scientist myself, but I have great regard for those who are. While we humans need our arts, our literature and our music, it is within the realm of science, medicine and engineering that we will find our way out of the challenges that are seemingly overtaking us. We will get past the current pandemic because of science. We will solve the problems of climate change with the knowledge and innovations of researchers and engineers. Those of us who are not on the forefront of inventiveness must help each cause with a willingness to change our ways as needed. If we simply lumber along obliviously eating and sleeping and not allowing our intellect to guide us, we are ultimately doomed as a species. If we keep wasting our energies fighting rather than working our way out of our troubles then the future looks dark and difficult.

We have a tendency to blame individuals for our woes when in truth we are the culprits who are undermining the efforts of those who have the knowledge to guide us away from harm. We’d rather quibble and boast than do the heavy lifting that our current situation requires. It’s easy to call a world famous virologist “Dr Doom” because he tells us truths about Covid-19 that we do not want to hear, but we are unwilling to do a simple thing like wearing a mask to protect ourselves and others. We will smoke and drink and desecrate our environment and then worry that the vaccines that have been developed to help us are putting poisons into our bodies. We waste our earth’s resources without thought of the future. We do not alway use the brains that have brought humankind this far, but when we look back through history it should be clear that our hubris has all too often led us to the brink of destruction.

Dinosaurs are our teachers. We my not ever know exactly what happened to them, but we do realize that it had to be bad. We must learn from them that life on this earth can be uncertain. The world changes and we must be swift and flexible enough to adapt. Wishing for the past, building fences around ourselves and ignoring the truth of data is not the answer. We have to do better than that.

I am a collector of shoes. While I don’t quite rival Imelda Marcos, I do have more than my fair share of pumps and sneakers and boots and sandals. Sometimes I wonder if I enjoy shoes as much as I do because I had so few as a child. Back then I usually owned a pair of sensible school shoes and some cute flats for wearing to church and special occasions. In the summer I simply ran around in my bare feet. I wore my footwear until I either out grew them or they wore out. As an adult, my feet no longer change their size and so began my accumulation of a multitude of colors and styles. 

I’m a sucker for shoe stores and big sales on the latest trends in footwear. I find excuses for owning just one more pair of winter boots, even though it rarely gets very cold around here. In fact, as soon as the temperature brings a tiny chill, all of the ladies bring out the boots that tend to last forever because it is so rare to have the proper conditions for wearing them. 

Sadly I can no longer wear really high heels or shoes with pointy toes. My feet will be crying for mercy within an hour or so and I’ll be walking in my bare feet just to be able to still walk. Really flat soles are not good for me either. Still, I manage to find some cute shoes that have both style and comfort after I try on about a twenty pairs. 

Ironically you’d think that I am a shoe fashionista, but my all time favorite shoes are shockingly practical. I purchased them in a hardware store in Boerne, Texas when I was on vacation. They were the kind I had often dreamed of owning. You’ve no doubt seen the style before on farmers and others who labor in the mud and muck. I’m talking about a pair of black rubber boots that fit just past the top of my calves. They are made from thick ebony colored rubber like you might expect to find on tires. There is nothing glamorous about them, but I absolutely adore them!

I have a variety of hobbies including writing, reading, taking continuing education classes, and gardening. When I put on those boots I know that I am going to have a great day in my yard. I can haul and spread dirt, repot favorite plants, trudge through mud, and even reroute water that is flooding a section of my property. I feel like my grandmother Minnie who would deck herself out in denim overalls, a flannel shirt, a straw hat, and black rubber boots to tackle the planting and harvesting of the crops on her farm. Best of all I can simply run my boots under a stream of water from the hose to get them as clean as if they were new.

I know lots of women get really cute rubber boots with patterns of little ducks or flowers or some such thing, but I want the black ones that show how serious I am about the work that I do when I garden. It’s not a task for the weak of heart. I get dirt under my fingernails and sweat on my neck. Best of all I feel born again and as though the little cells of serotonin are having a happy party in my brain. 

I don’t know if it’s genetic or if I simply love working outside with my plants because it reminds me so much of my fabulous grandmother. My thumb is not nearly as green as hers was, but I do a better than middling job of keeping the landscape looking rather lovely. I think that I would really miss the workout that I get planting and weeding if I were ever to become too feeble to continue my labor.

My grandmother kept up her yard even after she was diagnosed with cancer. She moved to a home close to the Medical Center in Houston and used the months when she was still okay to turn it into a paradise even though she was eighty eight years old. It must have been horrific for her when she finally lacked the strength to enjoy her favorite pastime. I suppose that is when she realized that her time on this earth was coming to an end.

I’ve had my black rubber boots for decades now. You would never know how old they are or how much of a workout I have given them. They sit in my garage faithfully waiting until I need them, and even though they are inanimate I hope they know how much I like them. 

I’ve never again seen a pair of heavy duty black rubber work boots in a size small enough to fit my feet. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to them. I suppose I’d have to go to the Internet to find another pair. For now, they are just fine and will always be my favorite pair of shoes.

I remember when company or school mission statements became all the rage. I even had to take part in the creation of one or two of them. I never really liked either the process or the products. The missions always sounded a little bit the same, and they were more often than not filled with platitudes. After they were completed they were usually features on the first page of the employee and student handbooks, and then promptly forgotten by mostly everyone. 

I’m not against having a clear mission, but most of the time mission statements are purposely vague which makes them very much like horoscopes or fortune cookies. One might easily be exchanged for another one without anyone really noticing. In fact, I often imagine the final products as initially being prewritten documents with blanks filled in to make it sound like the organization for which it stands. 

One of the best mission statements ever written was the Preamble of the Constitution of the United States. It rather perfectly outlines the intent of the laws that follow. Essentially it outlines seven general but noble goals including to form a more perfect Union, to establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity. Since the origination of the Constitution, the three branches of our government have been clearly tasked with maintaining the objectives outlined in the Preamble by following the laws outlined in the Constitution. It hasn’t always been an easy task.

Of course, as with any mission statement even the Preamble is purposely vague about how to achieve such lofty aims. The Founding Fathers wisely understood that a mission statement should be flexible enough to endure the test of time. So it is that our Constitution has been amended to allow for new philosophies and changing times. The Preamble, however, always remains the same in underscoring that the seven ideas in its body should always be the goal. These are commitments to a particular kind of government. 

I’ve often asked myself what my mission should be in the remainder of my life. Sometimes I laugh and think that just waking up each morning is an accomplishment given how many people that I once knew have died. But then I realize that greeting the new day is not something that I have actually done. It’s little more than an instinctive reaction. I certainly want to continue learning and with that in mind I read voraciously. If I did as much for my body as I do for my mind I would be quite buff, but I’m not totally bad given my age and the fact that I have not been able to return to the gym for over a year now. I’ll keep walking and hopefully install a  recumbent bike in the house to keep my muscles working. I’ll also partake of those fifteen minute HIIT videos on Netflix. I try to do something nice for someone everyday, but sometimes I get preoccupied with tasks that really do not have to take place, so I need to remind myself that kindness should be a priority. I enjoy writing, but I normally get inspired by the places I go and the things that I do. Covid has somewhat restricted my ideas so that I am not as satisfied with my efforts as I normally am, but then who feels normal these days anyway? I am determined to travel again, but I’m feeling a bit discouraged with the uptick in Covid cases, and for now my trailer is out of commission. 

I look forward to fall. I’m more inspired to be industrious and accomplish things when it is cool. The heat seems to slow my brain and my body. I don’t even get joy out of being in my yard when it’s ninety six degrees in the shade. Soon, however, I’ll be teaching my kids again, and there is little that brings me so much joy. I suppose that when all is said and done being a mom and grandmother and wife and teacher is my true mission in life so why would I need to create some kind of trite statement to define how I hope to represent my life?

In truth I’m far too much of a free spirit to tie myself down to a stilted document that attempts to define my future goals. I don’t even like planning my days too far in advance. I get antsy if I have too many appointments on the calendar. I want to be able to take a spontaneous drive or bake a cake or go out for lunch whenever the spirit moves me. I’m retired. I don’t want anything binding me to a particular routine. I’ve worked hard to get here and I just want to be able to wander however the spirit moves me. So I stand by my original thought that mission statements feel contrived and often quite meaningless. 

I hate to admit to mostly flying by the seat of my pants through life. I feel more creative and alive that way. I miss too much when everything is already planned. These days I can finally get by with being a kind of sprite, and it really feels good. 

I often wonder how other people actually see me. When I look in the mirror I am viewing a reversed vision of myself that is unlike the image that others would encounter. When I gaze at photographs of me I am unable to find a single one that captures the way I feel about myself. Only once did someone get very close to snapping a picture that connected with who I think I am. It happened to be a student who had brought me a lovely rose colored shawl for Christmas. He wanted to save the moment so he asked if I would allow him to take a photo with the camera on my phone. He sat me in a chair and methodically adjusted the lighting and the folds of the shawl. He had me turn my head until he found the best view and then he snapped several pictures until he felt it was just right. The results were beautiful. 

That young man has become a professional photographer and his work is just as stunning as the image he took of me. Sadly I changed phones over time and I have not been able to find that photo ever again. It was a treasure, so I should have saved it immediately, but I was busy in those day and did not think of worrying about a single photograph no matter how lovely it was.

There is an artistry in photography. Some photographers have a natural eye and talent, but mostly the best images come from practice. The pictures I like the most tell a story much like one that I feature in my home that won a prize for another of my former students. It is a happy scene of children reaching their arms into the heavens and looking upward with unmitigated joy. I smile whenever I see it. The young man who took the photo tells me that it came from a time when he took a summer missionary trip to central America. The children were trying to catch a helium-filled balloon that had escaped from their hands and was rising into the air. My very talented student realized that the photo would be much more interesting if he cropped the balloon and focused instead on the children. He was so right!

I have a niece who is a masterful photographer. She has a way of capturing the essence of people. My favorite image from her is of my grandson Jack. It shows him crouching on the stage of his high school where he often portrayed different characters in his acting class. The portrait is done in black and white. It is the very picture of who he is and what he loves. 

My husband and I have been watching features on Master Class, a series of instructional videos from experts in virtually every field. We’ve learned how to cook from Wolfgang Puck and how to think from Neil deGrasse Tyson. Recently we decided to watch a session with Annie Leibovitz, the famous photographer who has created some of the most iconic photos of both the famous and unknown. I was literally in awe of her abilities and her eye for revealing the inner beauty of her subjects.

Ms. Leibovitz believes that every photograph should tell a story. She learns about people and then creates a vision of them in places and situations that are meaningful to them. The faces of her subjects literally come alive and speak to us as we gaze on their features. Some of her work is so stunning that I became emotional just viewing it on my television screen. She is fearless in what she attempts to do which is a very necessary trait for a photographer to transcend from the ordinary into artistry. 

i remember photographic sessions from back in my youthful days. They always took place in studios with glaring lights and uncomfortable poses. Somehow I always felt strained and worried that I would look terrible in those scenes. Nothing about them felt like me and so the pictures look stiff and unnatural. 

Today’s photographers seem to be reaching for something more personal, more interesting in the photos they take. The three people that I have mentioned make everyone beautiful and important. They find the settings and the poses that bring out the inner essence of their subjects. Perhaps like Annie Leibovitz they understand that photography is an art. They have a way of finding the story that lurks inside of every single person.

I used to laugh at those Glamour Shots that people purchased at the mall. I think they were really just an attempt to look and feel beautiful. A great photographer doesn’t need all of the makeup and big hair to succeed at that. I want to hire one of my students or my niece to do that for me. I need someone who can help me get beyond my worries that I don’t have a photogenic bone in my body. I’ve learned that when the right person is behind the lens everyone looks gorgeous even without photoshopping.

Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. An artist knows how to find that wherever he or she goes. it’s wonderful that we have such people in our midst. Their work brings happiness, beauty and truth into the world. 

I suppose that what has disturbed me the most these days is how much we are fighting with one another, and how almost any topic results in disagreements. We are tending to classify each other into distinct groups when in reality who we are and how we react to various ideas runs along multiple continuums. The intersection of those things is a complex web rather than the simplistic descriptions that politicians and propagandists often use. 

I can choose virtually any idea as an example. Let’s say two people are discussing the Black Lives Matter Movement. It is actually possible to support that group without being gung ho about every single aspect of what many seem to think they represent. If I say that I believe black lives matter it does not mean that I do not think that other lives matter as well. In fact, that would be a rather absurd idea for anyone to believe, but I have had people engage in fierce arguments with me over this very idea. When I try to explain my meaning they generally quit listening or they are already thinking of ways to debate me on the idea. For me black lives matter is a very subtle idea that means that we have to begin placing more value on the lives of black members of our community who are too often instinctively viewed as being dangerous and violent in a very racist way. This kind of thinking is what so often leads to their deaths at the hands of law officers. It is also the reason why black citizens sometimes feel the urge to run from the police in fear for their lives. There is a tension and distrust that we have to address in meaningful ways that will make a difference for everyone.

For me the idea of getting rid of the police is not what defunding them means. In fact I think the term defunding police is a terrible misuse of words for an idea that is really about using fewer funds for military level tactical gear and policing as opposed to employing individuals trained to de-escalate dangerous situations. In truth there are others who say that black lives matter who are far more radical than I am. Lumping all of us together is a tactic designed to avoid a critical discussion of the matter. Over simplifying one another’s beliefs leads to misunderstandings and stalemates. Nothing ever changes when we are unwilling to suspend our own judgments long enough to really hear what others have to say. 

The converse of my thinking would be someone who is genuinely concerned about our justice system, but worries that saying black lives matter divides us even more or undermines the safety of our police. If I am to follow my own advice I must be willing to hear what they have to say, and consider how we might be able to blend our thinking. In fact, it is reasonable to say that in the end most of us want the same thing, a safer society for everyone.

Of course we have the radicals who are the outliers along the continuum. They often have frightening beliefs that become the face of each side. Sometimes we actually need them to draw attention to an issue, but then a bit more reasoning must ensue to come up with workable solutions. Sometimes the most radical among us are incredibly right and sounding an alarm that all of us need to hear whether we wish to or not. The important thing is to learn how to actively and critically listen to many points of view.

There are also people who are dangerous and we must learn how to differentiate between them and a young girl who is genuinely concerned about the future of our planet. I see people all the time comparing both democrats and republicans to Nazis. Of course such hyperbole does us little good, but we must be watchful for the real deals who are indeed among us spreading lies and propaganda and racist venom. Sometimes they are cloaked in religion or the American flag but if we listen carefully and watch their actions we soon realize that they are poison. 

There is so much noise and misinformation these days that it can be difficult to differentiate and determine who are the good guys and who is against all that is good in humanity. We have to be careful about living in a bubble that feels comfortable but does not provide us with all of the truths that we need to hear no matter how painful that may be. We have to be aware of how our own places on various continuums is influencing us to think and behave. If we only surround ourselves with likeminded people we become an echo chamber that reinforces even the ineffective and erroneous aspects of our thinking. 

I do my best to be open minded. It is very rare that I deem anyone to be all good or all bad. I am wary of followers who are unwilling to speak out whenever someone in power demonstrates malfeasance. I much prefer those who speak up when they see wrong doing even if it means losing something in the process. I look for courageous behavior wherever I can find it. There is no perfect leader but of late we have far too many imperfect ones who are being supported for all the wrong reasons without question.

If we don’t begin to admit to the complexities of every single challenge that we face, we are in deep trouble. If we can’t begin to genuinely attempt to hear one another we will become victims of an infinite loop of rancor. The next time someone says or does something that dismays you, don’t immediately argue with them. Take a deep breath and find out where they really stand. Don’t be thinking about how you will debate them. Hear them and then decide where you may share a common concern that might bring both of you to a point of real understanding. That’s when real solutions begin to unfold.