Category: Commentary

Once a week my husband, Mike, and I engage in a delightful excursion in a hidden treasure near downtown Houston. It has the feel of entering a different world where joy and plenty are in abundance. It is a foodie heaven, a cornucopia of many flavors. Of course I am talking about the farmer’s market on Airline Drive just north of the downtown area. There we engage in the ancient art of exploring the stalls filled with delightful treats at prices that would please the most astute trader. 

We’ve been going to a farmer’s market in this location for decades now but the newest iteration is modern, airy and filled with joy. Vendors bring their best offerings of fruit, vegetables, nuts, spices, plants, cookware and odds and ends for the public to peruse and hopefully purchase. Music and laughter fill the air as though a big party is in process. There is a kind of joviality to it all that lifts the spirit and brings smiles to the faces of everyone enjoying the experience. Best of all bargains abound. 

In an age of higher prices for produce this farmer’s market is the place to be. I find fresh, juicy oranges that would sell for a fortune in a regular store being sold at a price so low that I indulge myself with a dozen to enjoy for a week. I have recently purchased twelve beautiful tomatoes for only two dollars., three bunches of gorgeous green onions for a dollar and freshly shelled pecans that have not sat in a bag for months for five dollars. The prices and the quality of the items can’t be beaten anywhere else. Best of all the atmosphere is friendly and exciting.

Tucked among the vendors of fine produce there is the Alamo Tamale Company where delicious tamales of many varieties can be eaten on site or taken home for another day. A meat store boasts some of the most beautiful cuts that I have ever seen. There are people selling jewelry and even clothing for prices that seem almost too good to be true. Children and families stroll through the narrow walkways enjoying a day away from their everyday worries. Everyone seems to find something that they must take home and nobody feels as though their budgets have been busted. 

For those who are really adventurous a bakery sits across the street with lovely traditional Mexican breads and pastries just waiting to find their way into the homes of those lucky enough to have found the place. Across the way pottery from Mexico and South America is stacked sky high with its brilliant colors luring garden enthusiasts to come take a look. Seafood is for sale or ready to eat on the spot at another location. All in all the area has the same feel as a London market with vendors offering such a variety of items that being there becomes like a hunt for treasure. 

Be sure to bring cash when you come. Everything is old school, nobody uses credit cards. If you forget there are ATM machines posted here and there ready to accept your card and dole out cash to use. If you plan to buy a great deal you might bring a wagon to haul your goodies as many people do. On your first venture you may just want to familiarize yourself with the offerings and get to know who seems to sell at the best prices. Maybe you just want to be part of the celebration, enjoying the aroma of the spices and the sounds of chatter and joy. However you wish to participate you will walk away feeling glorious, vowing to return as soon as possible. 

Since Mike and regularly check on his father and his father’s house which are both nearby the market we have become regular customers for certain items that we use in abundance. We zip in and out most of the time now but always leave with big smiles on our faces, wondering why more people who live in the Houston area do not make the market a regular destination much like Borough Market in London or the market in Seattle. Surely even guests to our city would enjoy the adventure as much as we do. 

Saturdays and Sundays are like a carnival with all of the sights and sounds and sense of celebration. Weekdays are slower and offer the best prices. Everything is fresh from the Texas valley tempting shoppers to stop and select a bit of this and that for lunch boxes or their nightly dinners. It’s a way to hike and get those miles on the watch without the boredom of simply treading down a boring trail. 

I get a wee bit more adventurous each time that I visit the Airline Farmer’s Market. I try new things and tarry a bit longer at the different stalls. There is so much to see, so much to experience and if you take the right route home you might even want to stop in at one of the oldest Shipley’s Donuts store where the sugary orbs seem to taste better than anywhere else. The secret of this fabulous part of town should be known to everyone who enjoys doing things that are out of the ordinary. You won’t regret the trip that you make. 

My growth depends on my walls coming down.  Evelyn Underhill

I grew up in a very protective cocoon. After my father died my mother made certain that my brothers and I would always feel safe and loved. Our neighborhood was a fairly new suburb south of downtown Houston in which the troubles of the outside world rarely evidenced themselves. The people there were good and so were the schools and churches and activities for kids like me. My life felt free and easy aside from meeting my responsibilities for studying and doing my homework. While my mother was struggling with a hopelessly small budget I was blissfully unaware. Somehow I never once worried that we might miss a meal or lose our home. Life was delightful for me. 

I remember certain events that seemed to affect some of my peers more than they impressed me. One was the Cuban Missile Crisis that I knew very little about until years later when I was an adult. It was only then that I realized how close our nation had been to a nuclear showdown. At the time I wondered why my teacher advised us on what to do if an emergency situation arose. It was all a passing and meaningless event to me even though as a seventh grader I should have been old enough to have some kind of understanding about the gravity of the situation. 

It was only with the assassination of President John F. Kennedy that I woke up and saw that the world was a much more dangerous and cruel place than I had imagined. His death hit me hard and from that point forward ai began to notice more and more that was happening that would have an impact on me and my fellow Americans. In the blink of an eye I began to pay attention and to change. 

When my mother had her first horrific bout with mental illness I was still shy and reticent when it came to speaking my mind but I had already been thinking about the troubling aspects of the world around me and somehow that change provided me with the courage to advocate for her. Once I found the bravery that I needed I did not stop. I began a crusade of self discovery that lead to to the possibilities of ideas that had never before occurred to me. I voraciously studied political, psychological, sociological and philosophical ideas about the best ways for humans to live in harmony in a massive world. 

Of course my life had taught me to be realistic, to understand that there is no perfect panacea for the ills that seem to taunt humans. Nonetheless I made a concerted effort to learn about people and ways of living that I had not known before. Being a child who grew up in the segregated south I was shocked to learn of the mistreatment of Black people who lived in my city rather close by where I had grown up. I realized the evil of the old ways and welcomed and supported their integration into our society. In meeting them I saw that they were far more like me than different. In fact, over time I have witnessed the human characteristics that link all of us regardless of where we were born, how we have lived, the color of our skin, the language of our communication. It is truly in the content of our hearts that I see the glory of our oneness in a desire for peaceful and safe lives for ourselves and others in this world. 

As I matured and worked with people and students of every possible economic and demographic backgrounds I realized the prejudices that I once had and how I needed to eradicate them from my thinking. I began to understand how much better we become as people when we are fortunate enough to know and love people just as they are, not was we may have once thought that they should be. The worth of an individual has nothing to do with their income, their intellect, their country of origin, their religious beliefs, or their sexual preferences. When all is said and done there is no such thing as a more superior kind of person. The man who so meticulously maintains the landscape of my yard is as important as the doctor who guides my health. The glorious variety of the world keeps us vibrant. Isolating ourselves from others who are different makes us stagnant and uninteresting. Each person who is born has special talents and worthiness that it is our duty to protect, not shun. 

At the present time the president of our nation seems intent on isolating us and choosing only certain kinds of people to be part of our freedoms and privileges. He wrongly and openly classifies whole swathes of people as being either good or bad. He ranks humans based on their wealth rather than their character. He is unwilling to even consider alternative beliefs. He wants to create a one size fits all kind of America in which we all think and act alike. He rejects the idea that each human is complex. He prefers a simplification of life based on bottom lines and adherence to a single way of thinking. He has yet to break down the walls that constrict his mind and therefore make him ignorant and dangerous. 

I am happy that I have been guided into expanding my own horizons. Perhaps it was my father’s influence that encouraged my journey. Maybe it came from teachers who introduced me to alternative ways of looking at life. Perhaps I learned it from the variety of people that I have met over the years. Whatever the case, I am glad that I have not restricted myself to believing that some people are not worth my attention. Each person who lives and breathes on this earth began life as a gift to us all. We would do well to focus our efforts on helping everyone to tear down the walls that lead them to prejudices and hate. Once the barriers are gone life becomes so much more interesting and beautiful. 

“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead,” Nelson Mandela

When someone is in the public light and famous it is almost certain the he or she has made some kind of difference in the lives of others. Sadly that difference is sometimes quite negative and damaging. It is in the positive encounters that the full significance of a life is best measured. 

Of course nobody is perfect, so the likelihood that there will be bad mixed in with even the most good is a possibility. In most cases a person has a preponderance of a certain kind of effect on others that counts as a measure of life beyond any mistakes that may have been made. We are all human after all and as such it is doubtful that any of us ids perfectly wonderful all of the time, but some of us come very close to perfection.

I have been fortunate to know wonderful souls who truly dedicated themselves to the positive progress of humankind. My friends Sonja and VeeJay are such people. I met them shortly after I moved into my present home. They were still grappling with the medical issues of an extremely premature little girl who was so small that she might have fit inside a teacup when she was born. After many weeks in intensive care she was thriving and becoming more and more likely to finally be at home with her family. Before that her mother and father had virtually lived at the hospital and so they had missed greeting us when we first moved onto the street. As unselfishly as they would always be they wanted to make sure that we understood that they were quite happy that we had joined the cul-de=sac. 

Over the next many months Sonja reached out to me over and over again, inviting me to neighborhood events and sweetly introducing me to her friends. She and VeeJay went out of their way to make Mike and me feel very welcome in our new home. They paved the way for us to feel as good and we had in the home that we left after over thirty years of living and memories. 

It did not take long to realize that Sonja and VeeJay were loved by everyone who knew them. Why wouldn’t that be so? They embraced everyone with kindness and joy. We felt that we were very lucky to have them so close by our home and became valued friends of them quite quickly. Sadly we soon learned that they were planning to move. They wanted to be closer to a church that they had joined. They were quite active in all of the events taking place there but their drive to and from the place was long and taking far too much of their time. Besides, Sonja had decided to become a teacher there and it was also closer to VeeJays job. We had to sadly watch these two wonderful people leave us behind as they embarked on a new life. 

The best aspects of Facebook came to the rescue. We have kept in touch with them from afar and they have proven again and again to be the kind of people who make a difference in the lives of countless individuals. including ours. Eventually Sonja and VeeJay had a son to go along with their beautiful and talented daughter. Both children are like their parents in the depth of their friendliness and generosity. 

The family became especially important to everyone who knows them during the long days of isolation and loss during the Covid pandemic. They began featuring a number of videos in which they competed with each other in preparing food given certain ingredients that they had to use. Their efforts were hilarious, especially those of the boy who is a natural born comic. We all clung to the joy of those videos during what were sometimes dark moments. Theirs was a lifesaving effort to keep smiles on our faces and the whole thing worked splendidly. 

In better times they have gone on missionary trips to bring medical supplies and food to people in parts of the world where poverty seems grind good people down. They lovingly minister to them and help them to rebuild their lives and their homes, embracing them with the same offer of friendship that they gave to me and my husband so many years ago.

Sonja continues to teach one group of little ones after another. VeeJay is still doing his engineering work. The girl is now a student at the University of Houston where she uses her beautiful voice and musical talents to bring joy to a wider and wider audience. The boy is finishing high school and offering his comic sense to the theater program. All the while they embrace every person they encounter with a way of making each of them feel special and loved. 

Most people will never meet Sonja or VeeJay or their children. Maybe the daughter and son will use their talents to become famous but that may or may not happen either. Nonetheless this family has touched the lives of more people that most of us do in all of our lifetimes. They give of themselves over and over again for no other reason than to make everyone feel important and loved. I can’t think of anything more significant that a person might ever aspire to do. They have led the kind of lives that each of us would do well to model and I am fortunate to be one of the recipients of their largesse. They inspire me to be better and do better just as I am sure they affect everyone that they encounter. Theirs are great lives born from their great deeds.

I read the other day that there a something like eighty four Christmas movies available for the season when we get a bit sentimental and return year after year to our favorite flicks. I am one of those people who doesn’t feel like I have sufficiently enjoyed the season without repeating traditions that hark back to my youth, including watching movies that I have seen almost as many times as I am old. Christmas is a glorious time of year for me regardless of any trials that I may be enduring and my favorite movies are part of my traditions.

I have to admit that I have attempt to view Hallmark Christmas movies but I lost interest rather quickly. The stories were so predictable and the acting was so subpar that I was unable to keep my attention focused on the screen. Somehow I never quite understood the fascination that some of my friends have with the B level features. Nonetheless I am of the mind that each person should have a good time enjoying whatever brings them joy.

A friend and I once wrote a screenplay for a Hallmark Christmas movie in less than an hour. It featured a fallen, handsome and embittered ski instructor from Austria and a beautiful young woman visiting with her friends on a Christmas break. I won’t reveal the rest of the tale but if you’ve ever watched a featured film on Hallmark you will probably instantly figure out what will happen to these two seemingly opposite characters. 

Hallmark is associated closely with Christmas including its annual assortment of cute little ornaments. I first invested in one that featured Steamboat Willie whistling away. It was quite adorable and worked by attaching a wire to a string of tiny lights. It was truly one of our all time favorite ornaments until the artificial tree that we had been using fell and apart after years of use. When we purchased a new one the fitting for the ornament did not match the fitting on the lights so Steamboat Willie has been silent ever sense. When we place him on the tree we hum his tune for him but somehow it just does not feel the same.

Along the way I began purchasing Hallmark ornaments with sounds that nostalgically reminded of beloved movies, characters and toys from the past. Sadly most of them only lasted for a time and then became mute like Steamboat Willie. While they were still cute but lost much of their magic when they began to fall apart. This year I decided to skip buying anymore because I had become wise to the reality that having them in tip top condition was fleeting. I even relegated them to an upstairs tree because they seemed to be needlessly crowding my great room tree that is filled with memories of friends and family. The Hallmark cuties still bring a smile to my face but they also remind me of the vagaries of life. Nothing lasts forever, nothing ever does as they say in a song from another movie that I really enjoy. The Hallmark trinkets are a reminder to me that I should cherish people not things, and somehow that leads me to the movies that are most impactful to me.

I still get a warm and sentimental feeling from watching every presentation of A Christmas Carol that has ever been produced. I find The Muppets Christmas Carol to be the most charming of them all and maybe even the closest to capturing Charles Dickens’ timeless story. Now that I have visited his one time home in London and walked along the streets in Camden where Bob Cratchit may have roamed I have an even better sense of the moral that Dickens’ wanted us to take away from his story.

Christmas is a time when we deck the halls and come together as people. Hopefully while doing so we remember the forgotten souls who are not as fortunate as we are. We think of Jesus being born in uncomfortable circumstances and know that somewhere in the world there is another child being born in equally uncomfortable surroundings. If we truly understand the message of Christmas we will know that the giving should extend to those who need it most. The Somali child in Minnesota is as beloved by God as the son or daughter of a billionaire. All the glitter and gold is but a passing amusement in our lives if there is not love for everyone behind it. This is the kind of story that I want to watch, a tale in which we humans rise above our stinginess and isolation to embrace everyone around the world regardless of how different they may seem to be from ourselves. 

I love Christmastime and the joy it has always brought to me. I remember the magical moments I enjoyed as a child when my brothers and I hung tinsel on the tree. I have a fond memory of my father reading The Gift of the Magi to me and asking me if I understood the theme of selfless love encapsulated in the tale. I think of Mrs. McKenna singing carols at church and the creche on the altar depicting the birth of Jesus. I remember making gifts for the sick and elderly as a young girl and visiting a nursing home where some of the residents cried at the sight of us. I smile as I recall the raucous gatherings at my grandma’s house and the baking of cookies with my mother each year. My life has been mostly good so I know what is most important for living a wonderful life. 

All of the trappings of Christmas are symbolic reminders of how each of us should behave toward one other. Above all they tell us to smile and be generous with each other. We are only here for a short time. Each Christmas season is a gift for us to enjoy and share. If those movies or baubles help us love more then they have done their job. This is the time to not just believe but also to act. It is love that actually moves the world in the right direction. God bless us everyone!

A friend who proclaims his allegiance to the MAGA way of thinking recently attempted to explain why he believes in the political ideas of Donald Trump. I read his commentary with great interest because I believe that we will never set things right as long as we refuse to hear and attempt to understand the people whose political leanings seem to be so different from our own. 

I began to parse his statements with the knowledge that I have always known him to be a good hard working family man. He worked alongside me in one of the schools where I taught mathematics. Our students were more often than not first generation Americans whose parents were recent immigrants to our country. Many of them lived in homes where English was rarely spoken. They often had to work after school to help the family pay for the basic necessities of living. While they may not have been wealthy in terms of income, most of them learned the value of determination and generosity from their parents whose sole goal in life seemed to be to create a better way of living for their children.  

This man who was a fellow teacher also knew a great deal about repairing cars so he came up with an idea for the students that he thought might help them. He purchased an old automobile, parked it outside of the school gym and offered lessons on mechanics after school to anyone eager to learn the foundations of a trade. It was inspiring to watch him working with the young people and to see how much they appreciated his extra efforts. 

Fast forward to the present and I find myself reading the proclamations of this man in which he defended his stance as a MAGA. What I learned from him is that fairness is of utmost importance in shaping his political views. He claims to have no prejudices against immigrants but at the same time he insists that they come to our nation legally. Since I observed his kindness to our immigrant students in real time I can attest to his sincerity in this regard but our opinions diverge in many other ways. 

I too believe that there have to be rules in most aspects of life but I have learned over time that there is indeed a blurred line in which following the so called letter of the law sometimes seems more unjust than taking valid reasons for infractions into account. This is particularly true when looking at our immigration system. All too often the ability to manipulate the system is relatively easier for a white male who is wealthy than for a person of color for whom many Americans still have negative reactions. Take the case of Elon Musk for example. It seems that he came to the United States on a student visa but was soon working rather than studying. He violated the conditions of his visa but little or nothing was done to inhibit his ability to stay in our nation. On the other hand, the Trump administration is openly talking about certain groups of people that he calls”trash” and indicating that we need to rid ourselves of them even if they have followed the rules one hundred percent of the time. I truly wonder if my friend is deluding himself in overlooking such contradictions to his idea of fairness. Is it really fair to classify people according to personal feelings about their worth in order to make it more difficult to be citizens of our nation?

My friend then went on to describe his desire to make decisions for himself without government interference but countered his arguments for freedom by describing ways of forcefully attempting to change the lifestyles of trans individuals and those whose spiritual lives are different from his own. He does not seem to note the contradictions of his feelings in which he wants more freedom for the causes that are important to him but less for those that he does not like or understand. Because I know him quite well I don’t believe that he is just an angry prejudiced individual but he has wrongly bought into ugly propaganda that streams regularly from the mouth of Trump and is reinforced by his loyalists. Somehow he has been convinced to link his religious beliefs with a kind of harshness that denies the worth of many segments of society. 

I struggle to speak individually with people like my one time colleague. It pains me to know that he has been mesmerized by the MAGA way of governing. Because I know him well I cannot simply indict him and I don’t want to call him ignorant either but I cannot get through to him no matter how hard I try. Our only meeting of minds occurs when he speaks so kindly about the love for his students that I know that he is genuine. He proselytizes as though he is on a holy crusade to help all Americans understand what he believes to be truth while obliterating the possibility that there may be a much kinder and more logical way of living together in harmony. I may as well be shouting into the void whenever I attempt to make my differing point of view known to him. He is adamant that I have nothing of worth to say even as I go to great lengths to give him the benefit of doubt. It frustrates me on a very personal level to know how many souls like him surround me from day to day. I wish that the MAGAs that I know would be more willing to have a genuine discussion in which we might find the common ground that we need to make the nightmare of this moment in our nation’s history go away. 

If he would actually listen I would say to my friend that fairness can’t be limited to only his point of view. If we indeed believe that each person should be free to be himself or herself then that must include people whose ideas seem to be diametrically opposed to our own. Our only way out of this morass is going to be the moment when we are once again able to rationally discuss issues for the common good of all people, not just a chosen few. That is the very definition of fairness and in that regard there cannot ever be exceptions.