I suspect that we have all become weary of the bad news that filters into our homes on a daily basis. We live in a twenty four seven news cycle and after a time the constant barrage of images of war, dissent, terrorism, poverty, and disease takes its toll on our psyches. While I’m not a believer in ignoring reality I think that too much negativity begins to drain away our very souls. At some point we need to remind ourselves that there is still much good in the world and that we are part of it. Dwelling constantly on evil and hardship is counterproductive. It tends to bring out our fears and depressions. Taken to its extreme we become immobilized and sometimes even quite ill. I’ve always found that the best cure when the blues begin to overtake me is to get out of my house and outside of my own comfort zone. Giving is a tradition in this season but it need not be only about extravagant gifts or finery. Sometimes the simplest gestures help us to realize just how wonderful the world really is and they certainly bring joy to others.  

The next week or so is a very stressful time for students in middle school, high school, and college. While the rest of us are launching our party season they are knee deep in projects and exams. Schools are great big balls of stress right now and are generally more than ready to accept your help. Teachers are staying late to assist the kids and to finalize grades. Most people don’t even notice all of the cars in the parking lots well after normal hours. It is a mad rush to complete the semester that leaves everyone exhausted. There are things that you can do that will make a difference.

 My tutoring list is maxed out right now. Comprehensive exams require lots of study and review. Anyone with a particular skill set has the capacity to ease some of the anxiety of either the teachers or the students. Check in with the nearest school and find out what you might do. Bring a brief resume of your abilities. Enlist yourself as someone willing to run off copies, listen to a child reading, work with a student struggling with math, help to set up materials for a science lab assignment or even procure needed equipment or books. I have yet to meet a teacher who is not thrilled to receive new reading materials to place in the classroom library. Check out the tables at Barnes and Noble that are filled with the volumes that students are reading. Purchase a few and have them placed in the mailboxes of teachers that you have never met. Bring a batch of cookies, a box of doughnuts or a bowl of fruit to the teachers’ lounge. Food has a way of disappearing instantly inside schools. It seems as though everyone is famished especially during the long days just before the last bell rings for the holidays. You’ll be amazed at how much better you will feel when you begin to see all of the efforts that our teachers and students make. You won’t be nearly so pessimistic about the future.

Mike and I went to the Dickens on the Strand festivities this past weekend. We were standing in line fully prepared to pay the entrance fee when a perfect stranger gave us two tickets. It made our day. The woman disappeared as quickly as she had materialized. She wanted no thanks or compensation. She just desired to do something nice. Her gesture worked quite well. Mike and I enjoyed our afternoon even more knowing that kindness is still very present in our world.

Starbucks, Whataburger, and other eateries sell gift cards for as little as five dollars. Think of how much fun it would be to arm yourself with a fistful of such tokens and then randomly give them to strangers as you go about your shopping and holiday revelry. Put an extra twenty dollars on your payment somewhere and ask the cashier to apply it to the bill of the person behind you. Don’t even wait to receive thanks. You will float on air.

Take your children on a shopping trip for the less fortunate and then give your gifts to Toys for Tots or some other charitable organization. Bring bags of nonperishable items to a local church food pantry. Such places give their supplies to those in need without any cost to anyone. Take those pennies that you saved in a bank all year to one of the Salvation Army kettles. The Salvation Army gives a higher percentage of its donations to its clients than any other foundation. 

Make a point of visiting with friends, neighbors and family even if it is no more than a quick hello on the phone. The elderly and infirm are all too often forgotten in the rush of the season. The smallest gesture will make their days. I remember my mother purchasing coffee, cokes, and bags of cookies at Christmastime just in case someone dropped by her house to see her. She was always overjoyed when a thoughtful person spent thirty minutes or an hour just chatting and sharing her simple fare. She would speak of those visits for weeks. 

We rarely think of the people who pick up our garbage or deliver our mail and yet what would we do without them? Sometimes just giving them a thank you when they come will make their day. In fact, expressing our appreciation either verbally or in writing for those who are often almost invisible is an incredible thing to do. Tell the cashier at the store how nice it is to deal with someone who is as pleasant as they are. Write a glowing commentary for a small business that has treated you fairly. Take the time to reward those who take pride in their work. 

Use your imaginations to find wonderful things that you can do for others. You needn’t go far. Sometimes the perfect place to begin is right inside your home. Bite your tongue when you are feeling tired and overwhelmed and find yourself arguing with your family over insignificant things. Instead look for something nice to say. Forgive that person who made you angry. Wave at your neighbors and smile. Let them know that you are there for them if they need anything. Be kind and patient with someone whose political philosophies are far different from yours. Show them courtesy and respect. Let your own actions, not your rebuttals, demonstrate what you believe is the best way to live. Open your heart and do not be afraid. You will be all the richer. 

Most of all be good to yourself. Don’t harbor feelings of guilt or regret. We have endless opportunities to begin again. Each new day, each new moment is a fresh start. If we dwell too much on the mistakes of the past or worry too incessantly about what the future will bring we will find ourselves missing the precious joys of the present. Be fully in the moment. See with all of your being how beautiful a warm cup of tea truly is. Look at the faces of the people around you and simply love them in spite of every one of their flaws. Tell them how beautiful they are to you and tell yourself that you are special. 

We may not have the power to pass legislation or end the tragedies that seem to occur more often than we wish but we can make a difference one person at a time and the best place to start is by loving ourselves.