I have a friend who has experienced an incredibly tough life. He parents were demanding alcoholics but she somehow overcame the consequences of their addictions. She loved them in spite of their flaws and became a teetotaling coffee drinker who has never let alcohol pass through her lips. She is a strong woman who has made her way through all of the ups and downs of her life.

She was happily married until she learned that her husband was having an affair with her best friend. It tore her heart apart but she just kept on trucking and supporting herself even when she developed a blood disease that required regular transfusions. All the while she was one of those people who really cared about the well being of her friends. I count myself lucky that I was one of them. 

She and I always have fun together and she is never a fair weather friend. Whenever I have troubles she is the first to check on me and allow me to vent about my woes. We really want the best for each other so I was thrilled when she found love and married again. Tragically her joy was not to last. Over time her new husband had multiple strokes that left him bedridden with her reaching deeply inside her soul to find the strength and the wherewithal to care for him. 

For many years she was his nurse, never complaining about the constant vigilance that isolated her from much of the world. I saw her as a loving angel and marveled at her devotion even knowing that I should not have been surprised. After all, she has always been that kind of special person with those she loves, including me. 

After a very prolonged illness her husband died and she was quite lonely. She did not know exactly what to do with herself since the role she had played for so long was over. it took time for her to find her resolve once again. Along the way she met a wonderful man. They had both taken care of sick spouses for many years. They bonded over the mutual understanding of what each of them had experienced and before long they decided to get married. 

She has had a wonderful time with her new life which she so deserves. She has continued to be an incredibly faithful friend as well. No matter what else in going on in her life she always checks on me and boosts my ego. I am happy for her and hope that her trials are mostly over even as she and I both age and face the uncertainties of growing older. 

I have been blessed by this woman’s presence in my life. We have grown up together, had children together, laughed and cried together. I can totally be myself with her. It does not matter what her mood or my mood may be. We celebrate each other’s happiness and support each other when things are not going well. Nothing is out of bounds. We can literally feel the love encircling our relationship.

Such remarkable friendships are treasures. They only happen when two souls come together without any preconditions. Two people see each other, hear each other, care about each other. I have had others that were just as strong but for one reason or another they have dwindled over time. Two of my dearest friends died and others became overwhelmed with other responsibilities that made it difficult for them to find the energy needed to keep our friendships blossoming. They were fabulous in a certain time and place but not meant to be for a lifetime. 

My mother-in-law used to ply me with her wisdom. She pointed out that people come and go in our lives as we need them. Only a select few stay through the decades. She pointed out that when Jesus was dying on the cross his mother, Mary Magdalene and the apostle John were the only ones who were there in spite of what had seemed like his growing popularity and the fact that he had twelve apostles. She maintained that most of us will have only one or two people who stick with us through fire and ice. 

I have been blessed with wonderful people who have been beside me in the different stages of my life. They have shared my worries and my joys. They have been the right people at the right time and I have loved them. I feel so privileged to enjoy the longevity of my dear friend who might have had so many viable excuses for leaving my side. Like a loving sister she has been as steadfast as I have needed her to be. What a wonderful gift she is! I would like to think that everyone finds such a person.