All It Takes Is A Little Love

I have a brother who has a highly rational way of thinking. He is grounded in an extraordinary background of mathematics and scientific reasoning. He approaches the world with many questions whose answers he unravels through processes of experimentation and inquiry. He sports both an open and critical mind at one and the same time. He decides on the truth of ideas based on rigorous proofs rather than simple beliefs. His skepticism is not simply denying something because he does not wish it to be true, but a way of actually proving whether or not something is fact or fiction. In that spirit he has been a subscriber to the Skeptical Inquirer magazine for many years. He is a devotee to using the scientific method to determine truths whenever possible. When it comes to deciding on the worth of an idea he is as unemotional as Spock. 

The Skeptical Inquirer says this about skepticism: 

We are all skeptics. Skepticism is a part of everyday common sense we all use. It is also a key component of scientific thinking. It helps lead to fact-based judgements about what is real and what is not. It allows you to see for yourself which claims you’ve heard stand up to tests of evidence and which do not. 

Humans have used skepticism to advance scientific knowledge, but there have always been deniers unwilling to accept the evidence and instead cling to myths and false beliefs. Galileo reasoned that the sun, not the earth, was at the center of our universe. His idea was considered blasphemy and he endured persecution because he was unwilling to recant his theory. His proof lay in his observations of Venus with a telescope. He saw that Venus went through phases like our moon does. The only way to explain this was that Venus was going around the sun, not the Earth. He also saw three of Jupiter’s moons which would have been impossible if the Earth were the center of the universe. In the 1500s Copernicus reinforced Galileo’s idea that the Earth orbits around the sun. Additional scientific work over time proved Galileo’s hypothesis to be absolutely true.

Folklore is the opposite of of scientific discovery. It takes an idea and spreads it as truth without the rigors of investigation. There have always been tales and superstitions that have circulated in societies. in today’s world we have an anti-science movement that questions everything from vaccines to climate change. Sadly such trends slow down the progress of those who devote themselves to proving or disproving the worth of various ideas. Right now we are seeing a resurgence of diseases long thought to be eliminated as the anti-vax crowd insists that it is more dangerous to give their children immunizations than to risk catching illnesses like polio, measles, smallpox or even Covid-19. Sadly people are denying the research that was proven to be safe and effective decades ago. 

The anti-science movement is so prevalent and destructive that doctors, nurses, researchers, professors and all forms of scientists are literally being harassed and threatened with violence. There are those who would try them and incarcerate them just as Galileo was long ago. Things have become so bad that some scientific spokespersons literally fear for their lives simply because they have voiced what they know to be ideas proven by rigorous scientific method. It seems almost barbaric to have people returning to an unwillingness to accept science that takes us back to a time of great ignorance. 

Too many people are politicizing science and scientists rather than appreciating their efforts. There is nothing wrong with questioning things, but our sources of information should not be politicians or businesses or posts on social media. We should be seeking experts who have devoted their skills to unlocking truths about the world around us. We should be inspecting the validity and reliability of studies and forming our conclusions based on the scientific method whose steps include making an observation or asking a question, gathering background information, creating an hypothesis, making predictions and performing tests, analyzing results and drawing conclusions, sharing those conclusions or asking new questions, documenting the results of experiments. 

There is nothing wrong with questioning things about which we are unsure. We can even come up with our own theories about things, but unless we put those ideas to a rigorous test or do some massive research from reliable sources we are doing ourselves and those around us a grave disservice . It is foolhardy to pretend to know more than the experts. I’ve learned the importance of studying issues before making decisions. A bit of true skepticism leads us to fact based decisions. Beware of those who deny the truth simply because they do not like the conclusions. They set us back and make our lives more difficult. We have many problems to solve. We would do well to listen to those who have devoted their lives to investigating particular issues and using the scientific method to separate truth from fiction. Our future depends on whether we look forward or descend backward. The choice seems fairly clear. 

I am becoming more and more intrigued by the idea of owing an electric vehicle or even a hybrid. My husband watches videos from a car enthusiast named Sandy Munro who is an automotive engineer who helped Ford Motor Company to improve methods of assembly engines. He has taken to rating the various EVs based on his vast and highly respected experience in manufacturing. Surprisingly there appear to be a great many from which to choose that Mr. Munro rates as being worthy investments. While he still classifies Teslas as the best of the bunch he has been quite optimistic about many others that can be purchased for far less money. His commentaries encourage me to set aside my skepticism of electric cars. Now I keep thinking that it would be fun to be part of the revolutionary switch from gasoline powered autos to those that run on electric motors. 

I suppose that there was a time when cars first hit the market that people clung tenaciously to their horses and buggies. Only those who envisioned the future took a chance on putting their horses out to pasture and investing in one of the new fangled machines. There weren’t many gas stations along the roads back then and it no doubt worried folks that they might find themselves stranded on a remote road with no gasoline. Today I suppose that one of the main concerns about the electric autos is the lack of charging stations. I would submit that with enough demand our roads will be soon be sites of charging stations across the nation just as they are now with gas stations.

My grandson and a son-in-law have purchased hybrids that don’t need to be plugged in and run on a combination of electricity and gasoline. They get somewhere in the range of fifty five miles to a gallon of gas and are able to make three hundred mile round trip journeys without having to gas up either during the trip or when they get back home. The era of electrically run automobiles appears to be on the horizon and I’d like to be part of the revolution whether I go halfway with a hybrid or all in with a totally electric car. 

According to Mr. Munro, auto manufacturers like Ford, Chevrolet, Honda, Toyota, Volkswagen, Hyundai, Mercedes Benz, and so many others are already producing very reliable EVs that cost anywhere from in the low twenty thousands to over one hundred thousand for luxury models. While the initial sticker prices can seem hefty, Mr. Munro insists that these cars will last longer than conventional gasoline cars, save thousands in gasoline and repair costs. and operate efficiently. Munro predicts that electric cars are the future of transportation and that before long there will be charging stations all along highways and major roads. 

My husband is totally sold on the idea of having an electric car. He has always been an innovator. We had a home computer before most people even knew what they were. He promised that our first little machine that did not do very much at all would change our lives, and it did. I was the first person in my school district to have an electronic grade book that my husband created for me. Our daughters cut their teeth on computer games and even simple programming. Computers became as commonplace in our home as a telephone or electricity and running water in a time when the idea of personal computing still sounded like someone’s fantasy.

My husband made me a believer of trying new things, so switching to an electric car makes sense to me. I’d also like to install solar panels on my house, but my present roof is probably seventeen years old and I want to wait to see if a hurricane comes ashore and blows some of it away before I install panels on a roof that we may have to replace soon. I’m excited and ready to herald new ways of living. 

I still remember when my father brought a television into our home. I was not yet in school, so I could not have been more than three or four years old. I did not know of anyone else in our circle who had such a wondrous machine. Our viewing hours were limited because there were still very few shows. Nonetheless, we learned quickly how wonderful the old black and white thirty minute programs could be. It wasn’t long before everyone seemed to have a television in the home just like we did. 

I also remember when the very thought of rockets traveling to the moon sounded absurd, but I was there when the first American soared into space for a few minutes. Later my Science teacher, Mrs. Colby, would extoll the merits of space travel just as Mr. Munro does with EVs today. I still get chills thinking of watching the astronauts walking on the moon. 

People now get heart transplants and even mechanical ones that save their lives. I received injections that built new bones inside my body. Our smartphones are more powerful than the old computers used to put men on the moon. Science is moving forward and I want to race along with it. The hard part will be deciding which of the cars to choose. I guess I need to watch a few more of Sandy Munro’s videos. It may be a while longer before I take the leap of faith. Be ready though. If a car comes down your street and you don’t hear it approaching because it does not have a gasoline engine, it just might be me in my new electric vehicle. 

I loved the title of Michelle Obama’s autobiography, Becoming. It speaks to the process that we all enjoy or endure as we grow into adults. Most of us feel a bit uncertain about ourselves during those often painful years of adolescence and teens and early twenties. It can take time to fully appreciate ourselves for who we are. I’ve written about the moment when I looked into the mirror and was honestly able to say that I liked the woman I saw in the reflection. I was twenty-five years old and had two small children and the makings of an unfinished college degree. Suddenly I knew that I was on the right track and that I was a beautiful soul in my own right. 

Up to that moment I had tended to focus only on the flaws that I saw in my hair or my face or my personality. I wanted to look like and be somebody else. Finally I realized that as imperfect as I was, I was still pretty darn good. Over time I watched myself get better and better. My confidence soared and as it did there was a twinkle in my eyes and a smile on my face that overcame any deficiencies that I might have. 

I don’t exactly know how I came to that point in life. I attribute much of it to the love that friends and family showered on me. There is something life-changing about knowing that there are others willing to support you in whatever you choose to do or say or be. When others don’t care if your fine hair is flying all akimbo or if you gain a few pounds, a new sense of freedom from insignificant worries takes over. It bolsters your feelings about yourself and only gets better as you grow older. 

I like that I can walk around in my bare feet working on my garden with dirt under my fingernails and the people that I care about smile when they see me, not even noticing how sweaty and disarrayed I am. Reaching a point of feeling beautiful from the inside out is glorious! It allowed me to concentrate less on myself and more on others, even though now and again I catch a glimpse of myself and think that I really do need to eat fewer sweets or get my hair trimmed a bit more often. I suppose that the most negative feelings that I sometimes have involve feeling that there is so much more that I might do for people. 

I was reading reflections from a young woman who had lost her mother. She pointed out how we take life for granted. We get busy doing unimportant things and put off going to see the person who is feeling alone or making a quick phone call to check on someone. She urged everyone to live their lives without regret, a tall order, but one that we can improve if we set our priorities and then stick with those plans. 

Those weeds in the garden can wait. The silly television program is not that important. Buying a four dollar cup of coffee may not be the best investment. Instead we might stop our work to talk to our neighbor. That money for the cup of coffee might help a child to get a pack of paper or some pencils for school. Passing on television watching to write a note to a sick friend is a much more wonderful use of our time. 

When I think of the most beautiful people that I know, compassion and generosity are their most outstanding qualities. They may not be deemed attractive in the widely accepted sense, but everyone sees them as being gorgeous. It really is the content of our hearts that makes us attractive to others. People are beloved because they love.

I have a friend who recently died. All of us who knew her agree that she was a stunningly beautiful woman. She herself was embarrassed by her weight and sometimes avoided going out in public because she was ashamed. I wish we had told her over and over again that just being with her made us feel good and whole again. Her smile healed our wounded hearts. We never saw an overweight woman. We saw one of the most beautiful people who ever walked on this earth. We hope that from her heavenly perch she now sees how much of a gift she was to us. 

Look in the mirror and gaze beyond the superficial. Know and love yourself and your heart. Each of us is precious to the world. We have love to give that someone desperately needs. Therein lies our beauty. Let it shine!

My family loves a good rousing discussion in which everyone is free to voice his or her beliefs without insults or ridicule. Our only rule is that any comments be supported with sound examples and facts. It’s okay if voices become a bit loud or people take sides. When all is said and done we leave one another with as much love and admiration in our hearts as we had before the debates began. It’s always been that way and I enjoy it more than I will ever be able to describe. It keeps us all, including the children, open minded and delivers the message that free thinking is not just allowed, but actually encouraged. 

I remember an occasion when the subject of evolution made the rounds in our family debates. One of my brothers who is a mathematician, scientist and engineer by education and profession outlined the reasons that he believed that evolution was a sound theory. My other brother chose to take the con side of this perennial argument. His was a more religious based approach and he carefully defined why evolution was a theory rather than a totally provable reality. The two were going at it so forcefully that the rest of us just sat back and enjoyed the show as if we were part of some interesting kind of live entertainment. 

Suddenly one of my brothers announced that he needed to take a break to answer a call of nature and get a glass of water to soothe his raspy voice. When he came back refreshed he began to make his arguments once again, only he had switched sides without even hinting that he was going to do so. The other brother picked up the pace without hesitation and began to advocate for the side that he had previously been refuting. We were both delighted and amazed at how fluidly they had managed to change sides seemingly without any kind of previous agreement. The grins on their faces were evidence of how the art of debating was more important to them than being tied to a strict point of view. 

This is how I grew up. I learned from an early age that we humans hold a vast variety of opinions and that it is not only okay, but important to consider the differing ideas without anger or insult. I suppose that all of us might have been excellent lawyers able to represent either the prosecution or the defense. We played the mental game of discussion and critical thinking from the time we were young even as we knew that our beliefs were often divergent. We did not measure each other according to whether or not we agreed, but in the artistry of persuasiveness.

I know that people who happen upon our family gatherings often leave thinking that we are all a bit over the top. The topics we discuss and the ensuing back and forth can be loud and sometimes even sound angry. It never bothers us because a lifetime of hosting intellectual salons has shown us that nothing is personal. It’s all about pushing the envelope of thought.

My mother encouraged us to be individuals and we are. I still attend the Catholic Church based on my childhood religious upbringing. One of my brothers has opted for the Baptist Church. The other brother is agnostic and hasn’t seen to inside of a church for anything other than weddings and funerals in decades. The same is true of our politics. We run the continuum of far right, moderate and far left political leanings. We joke with each other about how different we are and sometimes wonder how we became so, but ultimately it does not matter that we will probably never completely agree on anything other than how important our family relationships are. 

Our children and grandchildren cut their teeth on the family debates and they love them. They often mention how polite and boring gatherings are at other places. They joke that a test of whether or not they have selected the right life partner lies in their ability to witness the rowdy discussions and still agree to come back. Some of those who come late to the family just sit back in awe and others jump into the fray with abandon. Ironically it is often the quietest person in the room who ultimately wins the day with his or her thoughts.

I have always loved the stories of intellectuals gathering in Paris sharing ideas and innovative theories. I am charmed by the communications between John Adams and Thomas Jefferson who had once been political enemies but ultimately became friends who corresponded until the ends of their lives which occurred on the same day. I think of Socrates challenging his students and enjoying those who were capable of challenging him back. Lively debate without unkindness is the backbone of compromise and good decision making. We learn simply from listening and suspending judgement for a moment. 

I love that no subject or idea is taboo in my family. We challenge each other to consider alternate possibilities. We are open to new ways of doing things and determined to provide every member of our group with the freedom to ultimately make their own decisions. Our mother encouraged us to be this way and it has kept us interesting. 

My life is filled with apps that make my smartphone a world unto itself. I can order groceries, communicate with friends, turn lights on and off inside my home, make appointments, listen to podcasts, purchase everything from paper to televisions. When my phone goes out, as it recently did, I come unglued. 

I woke up one morning to a black screen on my phone. I found that to be rather odd since I had plugged it into a charger, so I began to test it on other charging stations. In spite of my efforts the screen remained dark. Before long I really freaked out because the phone would ring but I was unable to answer. I had to get past the locking mechanism which was totally impossible. Nothing I did revived the once reliable phone. 

A quick trip to the store where I purchased the phone brought more questions than answers. The people there had no idea what was happening ,but they reminded me that I had insurance on the phone. They provided me with information on how to contact the manufacturer as well as the insurer. Before long I received notification that I needed to take the phone to a specified repair shop that was close to my home. An appointment had been made and the technicians would be waiting for me to arrive with my non functioning phone.  

Initially the people there concluded that I must have exposed the phone to water, which I knew was not possible, but I did not wish to argue with them. I pleasantly thanked them for whatever help they might have and surrendered my phone for a diagnosis and hopefully a repair. I felt totally distraught. I had not realized how much I depended on my phone. I needed it for directions to places unfamiliar to me. I worried about what I would do if I had car trouble. I realized that I did not know anyone’s phone number anymore because all of that information was stored on my phone. I had no games to play while I exercised on my stationary bike. My music was being held hostage. I was like a little lost soul. 

i worried about how long I would be without my trusty phone. If the technicians were unable to repair it the next step would be to send it back to the manufacturer and then wait until they received it and sent me a new phone. I knew that could take over a week, so I felt panicky, and even a bit silly that I had come to rely on my phone so much. It held so many aspects of my life including my calendar and the record of my exercise routine and diet. I used it to renew prescriptions and to feel safer knowing that I had the power to call 911 with the touch of a button. My photos were there. That phone was like my biography in a tiny package.

Things turned out well. The repair shop had to replace the screen. They were as bemused as I was regarding what had gone wrong, but just as I had thought, it was not water that did the damage. All was well the ended well and I felt great relief in having my phone at my fingertips once again. Somehow I have not taken it so for granted since then. I realize just how much I depend on its features and I’m rather amazed. 

My little red phone brought friends into my home during the long lonely months of the pandemic. Whether we simply talked or saw each other with FaceTime I felt so much less isolated. As long as the phone is with me and fully charged I don’t worry about getting lost or being unable to get help in an emergency and then of course there is Facebook and Twitter to keep me amused. 

Some time back I spoke of joining Twitter but being unable to figure out how it worked. I got so bored during the Covid times that I did a bit of studying. Before long I was zipping around on Twitter like a pro. In the process I became totally addicted. I found out that I can follow almost anyone that I wish. I learned that the Henry Winkler whom I follow is the real article. The little check by his name tells me so. Sadly, the Brad Pitt who liked my replies and began to follow me is a fake, but I did get a nod from Rob Reiner one day. I even have to admit to getting a kick out of having more followers than I ever imagined and I dream of someone with influence discovering my blog and asking me to publish some of my writing.

My phone is very smart indeed. I never would have thought of such a thing back in the days when there were still party lines and a single phone for everyone in the family to use that was stuck to the wall with a cord. If someone had asked me to imagine a future with such a device I would have thought that it was an idea from a science fiction movie or maybe The Jetsons.

I am content again, but now wondering where all of this innovation will ultimately lead. The future is already with us and I suppose it will remain bright as long as we support the brilliant engineers and scientists and doctors who are helping to create an amazing world. We would do well to encourage them to dream their dreams. People like them created a world that I carry in my pocket.