Category: Commentary

I was taught by my mother to be very observant. My father was dead and Mama said that if we wanted to live a normal life and go out even at night we just needed to watch our surroundings, be very careful. I became so good at vigilance that I was almost able to perfectly describe anyone who had been near me. I watched for certain looks and noticed if someone was following us. My mom said that I had the skills of a detective and often said that I had missed my calling and should have been a private eye or a lawyer. 

Instead I became a teacher and my observational skills helped me to notice when a student was hurting or stealthily causing trouble. Eventually they even helped me with my mother when she developed bipolar disorder. I was often able to detect small changes in her behavior that indicated that she was on the verge of a depressive or manic episode. 

At one time I was a shy little child, afraid of my own shadow. My mother’s illness forced me to become tough and even a bit aggressive. I had to become her voice, to get her the care that she needed. I no longer had the luxury of not rocking the boat. I developed the spirit of a warrior with the ability to see the world with unfettered eyes. I know a phony or a destructive person when I see one and I am not reluctant to call them out. I try to do so with respect and logic rather than emotion which served me well as a teacher and eventually the Dean of Instruction. I spent most of my adult life fighting for my mother, my children, my students and my teachers. 

Once my children were grown, my mother had died and had retired I thought that my days of going to battle for a good cause were done. I had planned to settle into quiet years of traveling and enjoying my hobbies and my grandchildren. I did not then know the extent to which President Donald Trump and unprecedented events would rock my world. Now I find myself reeling with worry and wonderment as we approach a presidential election in the midst of a pandemic, economic uncertainty, destruction from climate change, and protests for justice that have been long simmering under the surface of our democracy. During all of this I have sat on the sidelines mostly observing the different sides and this is what I see:

The Trump loyalists consider themselves to be the true patriots and defenders of democracy. They tend to be pro life and believe that only the president will protect the unborn. They are generally highly religious souls who are quite dedicated to their beliefs. They feel uncomfortable with the scenes of violence and destruction of property that they see on their televisions. They worry that our country is headed for socialism, communism and even a Marxist society and want to hold the line against such an evolution of our democracy. They advocate law and order, closed borders and low taxes. In general they want to be left alone to live in liberty and even though they often admit that they do not like the crassness of President Trump they prefer supporting him to watching the country radically change for what they see as the worst. 

While I respect each person’s point of view I see the current situation differently. So much bothers me about President Trump. He lies continually which makes it difficult to feel a sense of trust regarding anything that he says. In addition to that he savagely insults those who do not agree with him. The crudity of his language is disturbing and I cannot support it in any way. To me he is an embarrassment and the fact that so many good people have fallen under his spell is disheartening. I seriously wonder if there is any level of behavior low enough to convince them that he is a broken man who is dangerously unfit for the job of leading our country.

In President Trump’s attempt to retain power he has divided our country in ways not seen since the Civil War. He seems to take great delight in frightening his followers and portraying those of us who do not agree with him as haters of America, even traitors. I know that he is wrong and so it is time to clarify our positions. 

1. We love our country as much as and perhaps more than any Trump supporter. Love means being willing to note problems and work to solve them. It does not mean flying flags and singing songs. Many Democrats have served proudly in the military. In fact, today’s military is populated with astounding numbers of Hispanics whose parents are recent immigrants and Blacks who are proud to serve in spite of the racism that they continue to face. I am insulted when the president and some of his supporters insinuate that only they have the right to claim patriotism. I fiercely love this country and so do the Democrats that I know.
2. The Black Lives Movement indeed has problems. The ranks of protestors have been invaded by so many different groups that it is sometimes difficult to distinguish the sincerely dedicated and peaceful from the Buggaloos, Proud Boys, Right wing nuts, and Antifa. We know that our Black Americans have a real problem with unequal justice and coming down hard on them as they attempt to draw attention to the realities of their lives is not the answer. President Trump has had multiple opportunities to genuinely attempt to speak with the people who are so distressed and create lines of communication with them and police departments, but instead he has seized the moment to frighten many Americans and turn them against our Black Americans who have a genuine and longstanding concern. A wise president would have already begun a process of seeking fairness for them. The violence that we now witness in the streets is because of him, not Democrats. Why would any of us believe that the protests will miraculously go away if he is reelected when he has done absolutely nothing to address the heart of the matter that drives them?
3. That wall about which Trump so proudly boasts has only resulted in five miles of new construction. The rest of the “building” was merely repair of existing structures. Not only that, Mexico has not paid a dime of the bill and so many immigrants have continued to come that he has chosen to house their children in prison like compounds.
4. When the pandemic came to our shores President Trump chose to hide the potential danger from us. I think he was more worried about his reelection than the lives of the American people. He has created confusion and even more division over what could have been a glorious moment of compassion and care taking of all of us. He might have saved many lives but instead he further divided us and ignored the advice of doctors and scientists.
5. I am pro life but I also know that statistically the number of abortions has gone down dramatically in the past twenty years because other forms of birth control have become more readily available. The steepest downward trend in abortions actually occurred during President Obama’s tenure after the passage of the Affordable Care Act. While I find abortion to be repulsive I am also willing to admit that even if it is outlawed it will not go away. It will simply return to back alleys and result in unsafe conditions for those who hold to beliefs different from mine.
6. We are not headed for a communist government as so many assert, but I fear that President Trump will become more and more authoritarian and demagogic if he is reelected. He seeks power over those of us who do not support him. He seems to take joy in attacking us with lies and innuendo. That worries me more as well as the cult like following of those who do support him.
7. Our economy was soaring for seventeen straight months during the Obama presidency. Trump inherited a healthy financial state of affairs and had to do very little to keep it going. I do not see him as the economic genius that he purports to be.
8. Trump followers worry about increased taxes and now we find that Trump himself has escaped income taxes with very shady dealings. As someone who even reports a cash payment of twenty five dollars for an hour of tutoring it galls me to think that he may have cheated the government out of its due with highly questionable deductions. It also concerns me that he carries an outrageous personal debt to some unknown source that will come due in four years. Little wonder that he has been under an audit for years.
9. I cannot nor can those who think like me support a man without character, a man who takes joy in dividing us, a man who so easily lies. I cry for my country every time that he opens his mouth. I know how to observe people and I have felt that he is a phony from the very beginning.
10. I pray for the very soul of the United States of America and its people. I find it frightening to think that so many are willing to ignore all of his quite obvious flaws. This is what I see and I chills my heart.

I am an American, not a citizen of a red state rather than a blue state. I am an American, not a supporter of Joe Biden rather than Donald Trump. I have always believed that the President of the United States cared about me and my needs not because of where I live, what religion I choose to follow, my sexual orientation, my race, my profession, my income, my age, or my political beliefs, but simply because I am an American. When a man or woman who is President takes the pledge to serve, protect and defend I believe that that it includes me and every other American in this land. I am an American who loves my country, my state and my city even when I point to the difficulties that must be addressed. 

I am an American who has voted in every election from the time that I first became eligible to do so. Some of those that I chose have been elected and others have not. It is the American way. I have witnessed our Presidents doing wonderful things and also making mistakes. They have rarely been perfect but they have all given a sense that they understood the gravity of their responsibilities and they have tried in most cases to serve all of the people as much as possible. It has only been President Donald J. Trump whose number one motivation for any decision that he makes is seemingly to garner praise and affection from the people who voted for him, leaving those who disagree with him to fend for themselves. 

For months now I have thought of an old public service announcement that featured a Native American paddling down a river in his canoe only to find garbage and pollution defiling the pristine environment. At the end of the spot he stands surveying the damage with a single tear running down his cheek. That is how I now feel as we move steadily toward election day in the middle of so much decay and division in our country. I am engulfed in a deep sadness for my country because I am an American. 

This is a momentous time in the United States. Our President lied to us about the true dangers of Covid-19 and failed to provide leadership for a cohesive national plan that would have saved lives. He sarcastically made fun of those of us who comprehended the seriousness of the situation and pushed aside the suggestions of experts, opting instead to feature only those who catered to his way of thinking. He divided us into red states and blue states, republicans and democrats insisting that the only patriots of our country are the ones who bow to him. He seemed to forget that we are all Americans and in fact allowed his supporters to continually suggest that those who take issue with him hate this country and might be better served if they left. He chose to ignore the reality that we are all Americans. 

In the middle of our battle with Covid-19 a movement long in coming bubbled to the surface when our nation witnessed the death of George Floyd at the hands of police. Just as with Covid-19 President Trump might have admitted that we have systemic problems that require our attention. He might have been a true leader by bringing the different sides together to discuss changes beneficial to all, but instead he chose to demonize the Black Lives Matter movement and incite anger to lionize himself. He intimated that anyone who supports the Black Lives Movement is against law and order, against America. He used what should have engendered a serious national discussion to divide us even more. He was unwilling to see us all as Americans. 

As if our trials in 2020 have not been enough to bear, our nation has been ravaged by wildfires and hurricanes that are undeniably the result of our failure to curb the mistreatment of our planet. Scientists are clear that our human indifference is our very atmosphere, making the likelihood of natural disasters more and more certain. This is a moment in which President Trump might have conceded that it is past time to take measures to curb our destructive behaviors but instead he chose to insist that he does not believe the scientists. He played to his base rather than considering that we are all Americans. 

I now have a tear running down my cheek because contrary to what Donald J. Trump may believe I am an American. I care about and respect all of humanity, all Americans. I believe in our freedoms but also understand that with the great gift of liberty comes great responsibility. I do not walk alone. I walk beside millions of fellow Americans and it is my duty as a citizen to first and foremost understand that my state is supposed to be united with forty nine others. When one of us hurts, all of us hurt. My mask is a mark of honor for life. My willingness to hear the cries of the oppressed is a mark of honor for freedom. My understanding that I must sacrifice in how I live to save my planet is a mark of honor for all that God has given us. I am an American who understands the meaning of the words, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” 

I am an American along with almost three hundred thirty million others. Our President is only one person among many and I urge him to consider the duty of his pledge to defend, preserve and protect us all. I remind him that we are one nation under God with liberty and justice for all, not just those who wave his flags and flatter him with their adulation. His job is not about him. It is about all of us. It is about all Americans. 

Poverty exists across the globe, even in a country like the United States that appears to be so rich. We are often judgmental of those struggling to survive. We see their situations as self induced, the result of laziness or poor planning. It is sometimes difficult for us to understand how someone might get themselves into so much of a dilemma that they become homeless. We see all of the opportunities that our country affords and can’t imagine why everyone is not doing well. 

Sometimes it feels as though some people simply do not want to do the hard work that we are doing or make the sacrifices that might help them become financially sound. We see people on welfare who spend their money on frivolous things that we do not believe they really need. Sometimes they appear to be overweight begging the question of why they require donations from a food pantry. We find it irritating that they have cell phones and name brand purses but can’t seem to pay their bills. 

The truth is that some people are indeed irresponsible but many of the poor have simply become entrapped by unexpected circumstances. It only takes a few disastrous events to destroy the financial security of a family and when the head of the household is a single mom the odds are even better that a catastrophic illness or emergency can literally wipe out all previous efforts to budget and save for a rainy day.

My mother was only thirty years old when my father died. She had been enjoying a comfortable life with my college educated father who was a mechanical engineer. She had no reason to believe that she would find herself scurrying just to keep a roof over her head with her three small children but fate intervened and sent all of her plans and dreams crashing down. On the day of my father’s death there was no life insurance policy to tide her over because he had only recently begun a new job. The car he was driving when he crashed was a total loss. There were no funds in what had once been a nice savings account because of the expense of a big move that our family had just made. She had to reclaim her life from ground zero.

Things might have improved financially for my mom save for the fact that she would ultimately be plagued with mental illness. Her bipolar disorder came and went in regular cycles that made it difficult for her to ever get ahead. She literally lived from one paycheck to the next often worrying about what she would do if her car needed repairs for which she had no money. As things broke down in her home she simply learned to live without them. She was rather masterful at budgeting with what she had but living on the edge took its toll on both her physical and mental well being. 

The PBS series Frontline recently featured three families in Ohio that were struggling with poverty during the Covid-19 pandemic. All of them shared the common story of having a single parent who for one reason or another had lost her jobs and was having to make ends meet with an average of a thousand dollars a month. 

One family lived in a dilapidated looking trailer that they were renting. The mom had done her best to keep it clean and inviting. She had a kidney disease that had caused her to lose her job but she nonetheless found part time work at the Salvation Army where she helped to distribute food to the needy. She had two sons in the eighth grade and a toddler. They were a wonderfully loving family and one of the boys had become a kind of brother parent to his siblings. When the pandemic came and schools shut down this young man juggled watching his younger sister with attempting to do his lessons. When the family car broke down everyone had to walk wherever they needed to go no matter how far away that might be. 

They put on a good face but in the quiet of their own minds they were continually worried. The young man did not want his mother to know how sad he was because he believed she had enough on her plate, but he worried that his own anger over the situation might one day erupt and cause trouble. He enlisted the help of a kindly school counselor who would meet him for therapeutic sessions. When one of the boy’s favorite teachers suddenly died he felt overwhelmed but more determined than ever to one day break the cycle of poverty that seemed to have a relentless hold on his life. 

One of the families in the film was homeless. They found shelter with friends, moving from place to place as their welcome ran out. the mother had been working until the pandemic hit but had lost her job when the business had to close for a time. She had been unable to find anything and while waiting for unemployment assistance to go into effect she had been evicted from the apartment where they had been living. She had rented a storage facility for the family’s belongings but when no income or relief was forthcoming she had been unable to pay the rental fee and all of the family’s worldly goods were seized. She and her girls went from one place to another with only a suitcase of clothing. They all made the best of things and felt optimistic that their lives would once again turn around. When the mother landed a job as a nail technician they were overjoyed but still worried that they were somehow trapped in an endless cycle from which they might never escape.

The final family lived in a dilapidated house. The mom worked nights at a gas station for minimum wage. The two girls took care of one another while she was gone. They had lived in a state of chronic poverty long before the virus came. The cycle that had been unbroken for generations. The eldest daughter was a senior in high school dreaming of being able to attend college, becoming a teacher, and living happily ever after in a nice neighborhood in the suburbs. She had grown weary of living on the edge and worried intensely about what would become of her little sister who had a number of learning disorders. The crushing weight of want almost felt impossible to overcome.

Each of these families was valiantly attempting to keep it together under dire circumstances. Their situations had been disturbing even before Covid-19 but the changing economic scene had created new almost insurmountable problems for all of them. Such stories are being repeated in a million different ways all across the United States. Those of us who are more secure cannot be indifferent to their needs. We must see them and hear them and attempt to help them in some way. But for the grace of God we might find ourselves dependent upon the kindness of others. We would do well to remember that sometimes poverty is only a few emergencies away. 

My introversion is becoming incredibly comfortable with the forced isolation of Covid-19. For a time I balked and felt trapped in my home, but of late I have settled nicely into a comfortable rut. It would not take much for me to become the “crazy hermit” of the neighborhood. My quarantine is becoming a way of life. I only wear shoes when I’m on the treadmill and I have not worn a lick of makeup since February. I live in jeans and comfy t-shirts and only have a strict routine on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays when I teach math classes. Otherwise I’m free to stay up half the night working crossword puzzles and then sleep in until nine the next morning. 

I manage to shop for virtually anything I need or want online. I have not been inside a store in six months and I don’t miss in person shopping at all. I get take out food now and again but have no desire to sit inside a restaurant. I order all of my groceries for either delivery or curbside pickup. My pace is so relaxed that my blood pressure must be at an all time low. I no longer feel as though I am missing a thing. 

I’ve taken trips with my trailer as far away as Colorado without encountering very many people face to face. I buy gasoline but don’t use the facilities. I have my own restroom in the trailer I drag behind my truck. I get lunch, dinner and supper from my little kitchen and it is always delicious and way more healthy than anything served in a restaurant. The people watching is fabulous and I avoid crowds, something that my tendency toward claustrophobia does not mine at all.  

I’ve been thinking about the Tower of London and some of those famous folk who were imprisoned there like Sir Walter Raleigh. I suppose that he would have rather been free but he and his family lived in a fairly nice area and he even had the privilege of walking the grounds and tending a little garden. In some ways Covid isolation feels like that only I have the right to go join society if I so wish and I don’t have to worry about losing my head.

I’ve decided that I am doing myself and my fellow citizens a favor by just enjoying my time in my home until all of this one day goes away. I’m of the mind that in times such as these we would all do well to make a few sacrifices. If I stay well that is one less person the doctors and hospitals need to worry about. Besides I won’t infect someone else who may or may not make it. I enjoy the idea of doing my part to help others. I seriously do not understand anyone complaining when we are all going through a difficult time. We each have a part to play. Mine is staying home, serving as a remote teacher for eight students, and sending financial help now again to those who are out of work and struggling. I even try to give hefty tips to anyone who delivers something to my home while also using local businesses as much as possible.

I watch movies from the comfort of my sofa. I can even ride my stationary bicycle and do stretching exercises while enjoying a good flick. It costs a great deal less than a trip to a theater and my snacks are much better. My only concern is that the virus has prevented the making of new films and I fear that one day I will run out options to watch and that people who make a living in the movie industry are having trouble making ends meet. 

I suppose that going to church is the one thing that I miss more than anything. Watching the mass on my laptop is nice but I miss the community feeling that is always so moving to me. We humans are all in this crazy messed up dilemma together and I enjoy being part of a group of worshippers intent on praising and thanking God. I know that I have been quite blessed and I talk with God all day long but it’s not the same as being with the fine people of my parish.

I doubt that I would want to live like this forevermore, but I have become resigned to the necessity of doing so. I know that others are having a far tougher time of things than I am. I still decorate for fall and make pumpkin bread for an autumn treat. I celebrate the milestones and traditions even if only for myself. I’ve even completed some of my Christmas shopping already lest the mail slows down and I get caught without gifts for my family on December 25.

I learned to have patience a long time ago. This too shall pass eventually. I hope with all my heart that the virus does not take too many more precious people before it is done with us. I wish that we had handled things better from the beginning but it’s far too late to look back. Instead I have my eye on a time when all the world will awaken again. 

While I am feeling a certain level of contentment I grieve for those who have suffered and indeed there have been many. People have died, often without family around. People have lost jobs and businesses and are still wondering how they will mange to survive much longer. Students and teachers are struggling to keep learning without knowing how things will ultimately evolve. The specter of another surge of Covid-19 hovers over the world. 

I’d like to think that we have learned enough to change. Surely we have a better idea of what and who is actually important. I doubt that “normal” will ever again mean the same to us as it once did. Hopefully we understand that we are part of a global community that must work together if we are to survive the ever more difficult challenges that we face. Now is a time for patience and earnest assessment of the way we should move forward when the time comes.

It is now easier than ever before to gain knowledge about the world around us. The Internet is filled with information that rivals the greatest libraries of all time. With a quick search it is possible to find and read books of every sort and academic tracts and studies from the most enlightened minds of history. Ignorance is steadily on the decline as more and more of the world’s people learn to read, understand the scientific world and use numbers. The ability to use our minds is our most precious human gift and yet sadly far too many are still kept from reaching their highest potential due to cultural barriers, poverty, wars, and political indifference. Even among the educated there is often a tendency to blindly accept ideas without researching and critically analyzing them. Sometimes it is also true that there is such an abundance of knowledge that it is virtually impossible to know everything. 

We tend to get tiny slices of information during our youth. There is only time to expose our students to the very basics of science, mathematics, literature, philosophy, history. Unless a person continues to pursue learning after high school and dig deeply into a particular aspect of interest he/she misses so many remarkable ideas. Lifelong learning should be our goal but life itself often gets in the way of being able to continue our education. We get busy, set aside our books, lose interest in anything other than surviving from one day to the next. We close the windows of our minds and rely on others to keep us informed on an as needed basis. We often believe what we hear without taking the time to verify. We become more and more susceptible to manipulation because what we know is dreadfully incomplete. 

History is long and filled with contradictions. In the grand scheme of things our current situation is but a blip. The arc will continue after we are gone and it won’t take long for those left on this earth to move forward and forget the past. Sadly it is human nature to measure the merit of traditions based on the present rather than an understanding of history. Few of us know or care to know how things came to be, what prompted changes, why we are where we are. Yet sometimes deeply understanding the past allows us to make proper decisions in the present. If we learn what was really happening in the times before us we are able to critically assess the actions that have led us to where we now are. Unfortunately most of us have only a tiny slice of historical knowledge that is often sugar coated for presentation to the young. The truth is sometimes difficult to bear. 

Humans like to be happy. Life is difficult enough without stewing over former transgressions. We tend to want to ignore such things, just keep moving forward. We don’t want to worry too much about the future either. It feels better to just enjoy each day and muddle through any problems that appear along the way. The quicker we can shove difficulties out sight, the better. Life seems too short to spend time lamenting and yet there are moments when we humans cannot ignore what is happening around us. There are times when we know that we have to roll up our sleeves and become involved in the global connections that we all share as people whether we wish to or not. 

We appear to be in such a moment. We are facing two epidemics and if we are to survive either one we need leadership to unite us, not purposely pull us apart. We must accept that Covid-19 is a threat to all of us and that if we are to defeat it we need honesty and a united effort. As long as any of us are being falsely lead to believe that there is no danger, no need for precautions, everyone of us is at risk as well as the foundations of our economic and educational institutions. Wise leaders would tell us the truth and demonstrate a concern for both our physical and economic health. They would understand the need for unity and a willingness to sacrifice. They would work together, not with disdain. History has demonstrated time and again that ineffective leadership in a time of upheaval leads to unspeakable horrors. It is up to us to demand that our elected officials think first about the well being of the citizenry and do what is right with total transparency. 

We also have much civil unrest in our society. In truth our journey from a nation that embraced slavery to one in which justice for all is a given is not yet complete. We are still wandering in a desert  of sometimes overt and sometimes subtle racism. Even when we feel certain that we have never judged any other person on the basis of skin color or nationality or religious affiliation our indifference to their cries is an indication that we have not yet completed our obligation to set that original sin of our nation right. When hundreds of thousands of our fellow citizens tell us that they are still hurting, our response should be to believe them instead of attempting to silence them. We cannot and should not just turn out backs in righteous indignation. If we truly care about law and order then we should want to make it equitable for all. Instead so many shake their heads and click their tongues while our president daily attempts to make us fearful of those exercising their right to speak of their concerns. 

We are living in a modern day version of Alice in Wonderland. We are being led to believe that we need not fear Covid-19 when we should indeed be taking strict precautions. We are being told that rioters and looters are coming to destroy our nation and our neighborhoods when we have yet to truly learn what they need and we should not fear them. We are so busy attempting to drown out reality that we barely even take note of fires destroying people’s lives and hurricanes that level cities. We have enough real problems that we cannot afford to live in a land of make believe. People matter and many, including our president, are making things worse. None of us can afford to cower inside our homes quietly ignoring what we see happening before our very eyes. We have to speak up no matter how painful that may be. History demonstrates that the future depends on us. Do some research. Think without prejudice or self interest about what you are seeing unfold then use your voice, cast your vote.