We all have dreams of accomplishing something important in life but the eternal question that remains unanswered is, “What is a life that is truly well lived?” When we speak of “winning” what do we really mean? How do we find that often illusive balance that allows us to shine in our work world but also to be a good and loving individual in our personal world? 

I struggle with such questions. As a society we are often quick to honor the man or woman who excels in a particular career while underestimating the worth of those who lead quiet but incredibly compassionate lives. Who is of more worth to society, the person who is the CEO of a major company or the daughter whose time is spent laundering her mother’s soiled clothing, purchasing her mom’s favorite foods, and visiting her aging parent everyday at the nursing home? Perhaps there is no fair way to compare people but the elephant that always seems to be in the room is that our society in general does just that. We are often in awe of those who have tangible accomplishments of title and wealth but undervalue the enormous contributions of stay at home moms, caretakers, and volunteers. We bow to the expertise of a college professor but may question the knowledge of an elementary school teacher. We somehow tend to rank the importance of each of the contributions to the betterment of the world in ways that too often undervalue some incredibly remarkable people and professions.  

When I was traveling to Colorado during the summer I had to go through long stretches of rural territory. All along the way I saw farmers working the land. Few people ever realize just how regimented their days must be. If they do not follow the routines of the seasons and the demands of caring for their livestock faithfully they will soon be in trouble. Vacations and holidays are difficult for them to enjoy. Their days begin early in the morning and require their attention until the sun goes down. My grandparents were amateur farmers but I remember that when I visited them on their farm they had little free time. They had to feed the animals, work the crops, maintain equipment, and carry out daily duties. They enjoyed their lives but they were always quite busy and incredibly tired. I wonder how many of us ever think about the farmers and ranchers of the world and truly appreciate what they do?

We do our best to honor the men and women of the armed forces. We love our firefighters and understand the element of danger in their jobs. We feel a bit safer because law enforcement officers are patrolling our streets. We appreciate that we will find doctors and nurses waiting to help us in an emergency. How often, however, do we experience a sense of gratitude for the workers who pick up our garbage and haul it away? Do we see those who beautify our lawns as artists of a sort or just low end workers capable of doing little else? Do we have the same level of respect for the repair people who restore power in our neighborhood in the middle of the night as the lawyers who help us with our legal woes? Is the daycare worker any less important than the business woman who drops off her little ones on the way to her corporate offices? The truth is that we need every single person who contributes to the functioning of our society and taking pride in one’s role is what make someone a winner. 

My mom and I used to regularly eat at a certain restaurant in Pasadena not far from her home. Mama liked the place because it was impeccably clean and the service always came with a big smile. There was a middle aged man who worked there. His sole job was to bus the tables and keep the floor relatively free from the kinds of litter that diners often leave behind. He was masterful at his work. When he finished clearing an area it literally shined and appeared as though no one had been eating there. He did this without being obtrusive in any way. Most remarkably he bore a satisfied grin as he went about his tasks. My mother and I both agreed that he was the kingpin of the establishment. The food was not particularly outstanding but the simple actions of this man made the whole place seem more special. We suspected that he suffered from some type of learning disability because he had a difficult time holding a conversation but he was always a pleasant gentleman in his own way. He was definitely a winner.

I remember a neighbor of ours when I was growing up. He was a car mechanic by day and a great human being by night. He drove into his driveway at exactly five thirty each evening, enjoyed a relaxing beer and a home cooked meal and then made himself available to help with different projects that the rest of us may have had. He’d repair a car or install an appliance or replace a rotten board, whatever was needed. He didn’t have a college degree nor did he ever make a great deal of money but he was a good and faithful man who quite justly gained the respect of all of us who lived near him. I don’t recall him missing a single day of work until he was diagnosed with cancer. He went very quickly, at a fairly young age. There was little fanfare at his passing but those of us who had known him missed hearing the sound of his truck as he returned home each afternoon. Somehow the heart of the neighborhood died with him and yet I don’t remember any of us saying much about how we felt. He was a winner.

There is a man known as “Uncle Sam” who entertains tourists on the streets of New Orleans. He works quite hard moving from one location to another to do his act which is to stand perfectly still while appearing to be walking a little dog. People attempt to distract him or to make him laugh. They mimic his pose. They take photographs with him. He relies on their generosity to make a living, hoping that they will fill the can that sits next to him with monetary donations for his efforts. He is fun and makes people happy. He shows up day after day after day to repeat his familiar poses. It must surely be a difficult and insecure life and yet it appears to be something that he loves to do. He has achieved a modest level of fame but more importantly he has found a way to express himself and bring joy to the world.  

I suppose that if we are truly honest with ourselves we would agree that winning is an attitude, not a tangible accomplishment. Any life lived with determination, love, integrity, and compassion is remarkable. It is not in the “what” we choose to do but in the “how” we choose to do it that some among us excel. I remember one of my high school teachers telling us to do whatever we are doing with full throttle gusto. When we are working, give it everything that we have got. When we are playing, enjoy every second. When we are loving, pour our hearts into the moment. The winners will be those who approach life with a sense of optimism and pride. They will follow their hearts in choosing a pathway and then put their souls into their work no matter what it may be. We need everyone and we should be very careful not to take anyone for granted. The winners are everywhere.