I love the Dayquil commercials that feature moms and dads reluctantly asking their children for a sick day knowing that moms and dads never really get to rest. It is a given of existence that we must eventually accept certain responsibilities as we become adults. I assumed the caretaker role early in life. When my father died I was only eight but still old enough to realize just how difficult it was going to be for my mother to be a single parent. I quietly did my best to lift some of her burdens from her shoulders. I quickly learned how to be mature when I really wanted to be wild and crazy. I forced my personality to change so that my mother might have one less thing about which to worry. As the eldest child and a woman I honed the skills that would define me at a much earlier age than I might otherwise have done.
I learned how to be a woman in an era of great change. My female role models would become outdated even before I was an adult. The women whom I knew were from a time that was rapidly becoming old fashioned but I learned much from them. They built their worlds around their husbands and their children, often sacrificing their own desires for the good of the family. They arose early each morning to begin their endless chores. Their homes were orderly and well run. They kept to rigorous schedules for cleaning, cooking, and watching over their babies. Perhaps some of them felt trapped but I honestly never saw any of that. The ladies that I knew were quite content to do the jobs that they associated with being successful women. Continue reading “Seasons of Our Lives”
I suspect that we have all become weary of the bad news that filters into our homes on a daily basis. We live in a twenty four seven news cycle and after a time the constant barrage of images of war, dissent, terrorism, poverty, and disease takes its toll on our psyches. While I’m not a believer in ignoring reality I think that too much negativity begins to drain away our very souls. At some point we need to remind ourselves that there is still much good in the world and that we are part of it. Dwelling constantly on evil and hardship is counterproductive. It tends to bring out our fears and depressions. Taken to its extreme we become immobilized and sometimes even quite ill. I’ve always found that the best cure when the blues begin to overtake me is to get out of my house and outside of my own comfort zone. Giving is a tradition in this season but it need not be only about extravagant gifts or finery. Sometimes the simplest gestures help us to realize just how wonderful the world really is and they certainly bring joy to others. 
I’ve had a number of modern day problems this year. I’ve even felt a bit sorry for myself in having to deal with them. My irrigation system sprung a major leak and had to be repaired. I had to invest a great deal of money in an implant for a lost tooth. My old shower stall became rickety and unsightly, so I asked for a new one for my birthday. I had surgery to repair a torn meniscus in my left knee and then underwent several weeks of physical therapy. Mike needed a couple of crowns for his teeth. Our HOA demanded that we power wash our driveway and paint the side of our house. Even my old Christmas tree bit the dust and had to be replaced at the eleventh hour. All of this has made me feel glum and beset upon. Who wouldn’t feel overwhelmed, right? 
